Redneck Pig

City Slicker, Jim Bob stopped in to see his cousin, Billy Ray, whom he hadn’t seen for a couple of years. As he drove in to the farmyard, Jim Bob couldn’t help but notice a three legged pig running around in the farmyard.

After a little small talk, Jim Bob finally had to ask Billy Ray about the three legged pig.

“Wal, dat dere is the best dern pig I ever had,” said Billy Ray. “He helps round up all of the cows without any help, and he comes and fetches me right away if any of the horses get out of the corral.”

Jim Bob was impressed.

“Not only that,” said Billy Ray. “He came and woke me up one night when the barn started on fire. That pig, wakin’ me like that, saved me losin’ a bunch of my stock and saved me a whole lot ‘o money. Wal, I coulda lost the whole barn.”

Again, Jim Bob was impressed.

“But, the best thing he ever did was save the life of my two-year-old son, Linus. Linus wandered out onto the highway over yonder just when a big semi was steamin’ down the road. That pig ran out into the highway and dragged young Linus back to the side of the road kickin’ ‘n screamin’. That semi would have hit and killed Linus, as sure as I’m standin’ here.”

“Well, Billy Ray, that’s just remarkable, that a pig could do that,” said Jim Bob. “But, why does it have only three legs?”

“Wal,” said Billy Ray. “When ya’ have a terrific pig like that, ya’ don’t want to eat it all at once.”

Copyright 2007. Seamus McCafferty. All rights reserved.

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