Redneck Hand Grenade

We are in a sort of redneck state of mind today, and what could be more redneck than hand grenades?

Ever wonder what might happen if rednecks were allowed to carry hand grenades? Surely they would carry grenades while hunting, which means that Vice Presidents could do so too.


Eventually we would see a news report that Vice President Dick Cheney blew up a lawyer while quail hunting. Naturally, the lawyer would insist that the explosion was his fault, not the Vice President’s.

“It was imprudent of that attorney to have been standing so near that quail when the Vice President was hunting with hand grenades,” said the white house spokesman.

At least, if you hunted quail with hand grenades, all of the bird’s feathers would be plucked automatically. But so would most of the rest of the bird. Not much bird left to eat at all, actually.

But it’s the thrill of the hunt that we really seek. Food gathering qualifies as a mere secondary goal and is not even remotely significant.

And, strangely enough, that is also the mind set of the lads in our first video, which covers this issue quite thoroughly, thank you. Have a look.

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One need not be an adult to wear the redneck label. The young lad on the bike in this next video is well on his way to becoming a full blown redneck, if he has not already arrived there.

But the kid was obviously talked into this stunt. He apparently has several accomplices in the remarkably “intelligent” video. There are two photographers on screen right plus the motorcyclist who helped the teen pick up enough speed to enable the loud smack when the biker and the sign violently meet.

You can also hear the muffled snickering in the background after the biker crouches below the sign in a daze.

Gather one highly impressionable teenager with two or three young men who are only slightly older, and, voila!, you suddenly have a teen willing to do just about anything to fit in with the older guys.

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It clearly must be James Bond behind the wheel in our last video because this driver is one cool customer as he waits on the train tracks until the last possible moment to accelerate his vehicle out of the train’s path. There was not even one second to spare.

If you were able to time the gap between the car leaving the tracks and the train arriving at the intersection, it must be only a fraction of a second. But that is clearly what the videographer wanted.

The near miss is what makes the video worth watching. No one gets worked up about a three second near miss. But a near miss of less than one second will make the video popular all over the Internet.

My guess is the driver is another teenager, and he is probably driving the folks’ car. If this kid lives long enough, he may make a terrific movie stunt man. However, if he continues taking chances like this, the kid may well be history before he has an opportunity to grow into any kind of man.

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