Breaking News: Zoologist Goes on Tranquilizing Rampage

McCafferty’s Pub Radio News

We are reporting breaking news today. It seems that an unemployed zoologist went on a tranquilizer rampage at the San Diego Zoo today, randomly shooting his tranquilizer gun at staff and visitors leaving many brutally sedated zoo patrons in his wake.

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I personally have never been “brutally” sedated, so I can only imagine what a vicious moment it was. When are we going to develop a system to keep these hapless unemployed zoologists in check before any more of them go viciously postal?


More Breaking News: Wealthy Housewife Learns Spanish for Some Reason.

A millionaire housewife mysteriously took it upon herself to learn Spanish for some reason. Now Claire Thompson speaks to her domestic help in their native language.

Podcast-It’s like watching a video with your eyes closed!

Check out the podcast for the radio news report:

This one is completely unexplainable. Why would a rich housewife want to know how to speak Spanish? Go figure.

Perhaps her husband should take her to a psychiatrist because she must be sick?

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