Category Archives: Barry

Barry Bonds Indicted for Perjury

Barry Bonds, the former San Francisco Giant who broke Hank Aaron’s 755 home run record last year and hitting a career total 762 home runs, was indicted on Thursday on four counts of perjury and one count of obstruction of justice.

Bonds is accused of lying under oath before a federal grand jury in 2003 when he denied using banned drugs. The indictment states that Bonds lied when he stated under oath that he never used steroids, testosterone, human growth hormone and tetrahydrogestrinone, a drug nick named “the clear,” which was a steroid that was undetectable at that time and was developed by the Bay Area Laboratory Co-Operative (BALCO).

The indictment also stated that Bonds lied when he testified before the grand jury that his personal trainer, Greg Anderson, never injected him with drugs. Anderson was released from prison Thursday night after having been jailed over a year for contempt of court for his refusal to testify against Bonds.

Bonds earned $17 million last year playing with the Giants, but the team declined signing him for another season. Bonds was named the National League’s Most Valuable Player seven times, five of them as a Giant and twice when he played for the Pittsburgh Pirates.

On August 7, 2007, Bonds hit his 756th home run, surpassing Aaron’s record and making him baseball’s new home run king.

The 43-year-old outfielder will be arraigned December 7th and could face as much as 30 months in jail if convicted.

A Few Humorous Lessons From Life

Here are a few lessons one eventually learns from life:

  • Never be afraid to try something new. Remember that a lone amateur built the Ark. A large group of professionals built the Titanic.
  • Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
  • Never lick a steak knife.
  • Never say anything to a woman that even remotely suggests that you think she’s pregnant unless you can see an actual baby emerging from her at that moment.
  • People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with them.
  • There is a very fine line between “hobby” and “mental illness.”
  • There comes a time when you should stop expecting other people to make a big deal about your birthday. That time is age eleven.

–Thanks to Dave Barry