Category Archives: children

And Baby Makes…One Too Many?—Viral Video

baby-too-many

In the original video on YouTube that went viral in one big hurry, this little man goes ballistic when mom tells him he will soon have a little brother or sister to help take care of.

It seems that there is no telling what some folks’ attitudes will be on any subject. “This is exasperating!” and “it doesn’t make no sense!”

 

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3-Year-Old and Octogenarian Are Unusual Best Friends

emmet-erling

3.5 year-old Emmet and 89.5 year-old Erling are the best of friends, so much so that they are almost inseparable. Shouldn’t such a friendship almost guarantee a happy ending? Perhaps not.

Check out our video to see:

 

“Drunk” Baby Trashes Bar – Video

A baby who appears to have had too many margaritas trashes a make believe bar in Las Palmas. Behaving like so many other out of control drunks, the baby steals food and drink from another patron’s table and falls down drunk smashing a chair and a table in the process.

The “bar” is really a tiny size set for a movie, and the “patrons” are actually puppets on a string. Our video is really a trailer for an upcoming short film, Las Palmas.

The baby is real however, and the film is the brainstorm of Johannes Nyholm, who is a 37-year-old Swedish director with a lot of imagination. His other shorts can be found at http://www.youtube.com/user/johannesnyholm#p/a/u/2/yedD4JsZyT0.

This imaginative video has quickly gone viral on YouTube with about 7 million views.

 

Baby Twins Talk in Funny, Animated Conversation – Viral Video

Two baby twins are caught in the act of conversing with each other in a pleasantly animated fashion. It is hard to believe that these two do not understand at least some of what they are saying to each other.

Make no mistake about it, each is intent upon conversing with the other twin. Their arm and foot gestures are so believable that this vid has gone viral in a very short amount of time with over 23 million views in less than three months.

Well, those two certainly convinced me. I am not sure what point they were trying to make, but I believe that they believe it.

"They Told Me to Kill, to Rape Children" – Video

While the International Criminal Court (ICC) in The Hague, Netherlands, issued a landmark arrest warrant against Sudanese President Omar Hassan al-Bashir for ordering war crimes to be committed in Darfur, a CNN reporter, Nic Robertson, interviewed a former Sudanese soldier who was ordered to rape and kill children by his superior officers.

The use of rape as a weapon of war is common in the Darfur area of Sudan and inside the huge displacement camps serving as home to the several million Darfuri refugees, who have been uprooted by the war. In many camps rape victims are giving birth to as many as 20 babies per month–babies who are then subsequently abandoned by their mothers.

The soldier is called Adam, but that is not his real name. Adam was forcibly conscripted into the Sudanese army and trained to kill by shooting targets, after which his officers told him “we will be taken to a patrol and then soon after that we were asked to join other people to go and burn and kill people.”

It was then that he realized that he was being forced into a war against his will and against his own people. He was told that if he resisted his superior officers’ orders, he would be killed. “The order is that the soldiers at the front, and there are some people who are watching you from behind, if you try to escape or do anything you will get shot. The order is that we go to the village, burn it and kill the people,” said Adam.

“I had no choice,” he said “but I will say that I didn’t kill anybody, but the raping of the small children, it was bad.” The children, “they cry out,” said Adam. “Two persons will capture her while she is crying and another raping her, then they leave her there.”

Adam said that the soldiers raped girls as young as 12, and the officers ordered them to so because it will make people flee their villages–make them run away and never come back.

Adam tried to desert the army as soon as possible, but he was caught and subsequently tortured. The soldiers tied him down under a tree, and then the officers would set fire to tires above him. The burning rubber would drip onto his body burning his skin. He showed the scars left on his skin by the burning rubber.

Was he forced to rape children? “Yes I did, they were government orders,” replied Adam.

“It didn’t feel like raping, I was feeling very bad but as I was ordered, I had to do something. What I did was take off my trousers and lay myself on top of the girl but I didn’t feel like raping, so I lay there for about 15 minutes.”

“So you didn’t actually penetrate the girls?” he was asked. No, he said, “because I had no feeling for it, my penis didn’t actually wake up, so there was no actual penetration,” Adam answered.

Adam said that he has trouble sleeping at night. But he is not alone. Aid workers in Darfur say that millions of women in Darfur also have trouble sleeping at night. But, more importantly, they also live in constant fear of rape day and night.

The following video is a CNN report about the interview of the soldier:

Gang of Children Caught Roasting Live Puppies Over Bonfire – Video
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Pilot Lands on Only One Wing

Gang of Children Caught Roasting Live Puppies Over Bonfire – Video


A gang of children from age 10 to early teens were caught slowly roasting two live young puppies over an open bonfire along a canal bank near Manchester, England. The two adorable puppies were clearly shocked and had huddled together for each other’s protection.

They were yelping loudly in both panic and distress while their fur began to burn, and the pair was desperately struggling to escape from their tormentors.

Fortunately for the young pups 32-year-old Melanie Johnson was walking nearby and heard the commotion. When she came upon the scene the woman ordered the gang to release the puppies immediately, which they did.

Said Johnson, “I just could not believe the cruelty being shown by these kids. If I hadn’t turned up, I think they would have burned the dogs alive.”

“I was ripping mad and still am to think that anyone, least of all children, could do this.”

Johnson first took the puppies home, wrapped them in a towel and then brought them to an animal shelter to be examined by a veterinarian. Surprisingly, the cross-bred puppies were found to be in relatively good condition considering their plight.

Jean Spencer, the shelter manager, said, “the puppies are only seven weeks old and still smelled of smoke from the bonfire when they arrived.”

“The fur on one of them was singed and the other has a small hernia. Fortunately, they are going to be fine.”

“To think that children could be so cruel is really disgusting,” she added. “The puppies are absolutely gorgeous. Everyone here has fallen in love with them.”

The male puppy was named Guy, while his sister was named Cinders, apt names for a duo who were rescued from certain death just in the nick of time.

The police have not arrested any suspects at present.

The following video is an account of the poor puppies’ misadventure presented by the Manchester Evening News:

Note: Because the nature of this story is so provocative, we sourced the story from several newspapers, including The Advertiser and the Mail Online to insure its accuracy.

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Funny Irish Drinking Stories, Limericks, Irish Proverbs and Irish Blessings – Video

I have decided to add the category of limericks to our Irish drinking stories, blessings and proverbs. Ireland does not have a corner on the limerick market, but Ireland has certainly contributed its share in that area. I have always enjoyed limericks, so I hope that you, too, will like the additional fun.

***

As Father Fitzgerald was walking down the street in Dublin, he spied across the way young Michael Donovan, a small boy living in his parish. Michael was at the door of a home across the street attempting to push the doorbell.

But young Michael is on the short side and the doorbell, which is a bit on the high side, was simply too high for him to reach no matter how hard he stretched. Father watched young Michael stretch and strain toward the bell for a short time, but the bell drew no closer to the small child‘s fingers.

Father Fitzgerald strode quickly across the street ending up directly behind Michael standing at the door. While gently placing his hand on the small child’s shoulder, the good man of God bent lower and gave the doorbell a firm, hard ring.

Then, squatting down lower to young Michael’s height, Father Fitzgerald smiled knowingly and asked, “And now what, my young man?”

“Now, Fadder?” replied Michael grinning, “Now we run!”



Limericks

Epitaph on a tombstone somewhere in Pennsylvania:

Here lies the body
of Jonathan Blake,
Stepped on the gas
instead of the brake.

Another epitaph in a cemetery in Thurmont, Maryland:

Here lies an Atheist
All dressed up
And no place to go.


A true Irishman considers a bore to be someone who constantly interrupts.

A true Irishman considers anyone who won’t come around to his point of view to be hopelessly stubborn.

(Aha! Now I know where I got that trait!)

A true Irishman has so much respect for the truth that he uses it only in emergencies.


The three elderly Gallagher sisters have never married, they go everywhere together and they are all hard of hearing. One windy Spring day as they are walking down the streets of Dublin…

Mary Elizabeth says, “Whew, it is sure windy today.”

Molly replies, “No, no. Today is Thursday.”

Kathleen says, “So am I. Let’s find a bar!


Whenever I dream,
It seems I dream
Of Erin’s rolling hills
Of all its lovely, shimmery lakes
And little babbling rills.
I hear a colleen’s lilting laugh
Across a meadow fair.
And in my dreams
Its almost seems
To me that I am there
O, Ireland! O, Ireland!
We’re Never far apart
For you and all your beauty
Fill my mind and touch my heart.


May the love and protection
Saint Patrick can give
Be yours in abundance
As long as you live.


‘Twas late one Saturday night, when the local Garda (police officer) spied Timothy O’Carroll driving in quite a meandering fashion along the streets of County Cork. After pulling him over, the policeman asked O’Carroll if he had been drinking that night.

“Who told on me?” asked Timothy. “Well, so I have, occifer. So I have,” continued the thoroughly drunk O’Carroll. “It’s Saturday night, you know. Me and me lads, we made a stop by the pub, but I only had six or seven pints, that’s all.”

“But then they had somethin’ called ‘Happy Hour’ during which they served these delicious margaritos, or margaritas? Anyway they are quite good. I had four…no five of those. Then I had promised to drive O’Hara, me friend, home, and he invited me in. Well, I had to go in for a couple pints of Guinness. I really couldn’t be rude, now occifer, Could I? Of course, on the way home I stopped to get another pint for later…”

At that point Timothy began fumbling around inside his coat and suddenly lifted up a bottle of whiskey for the Garda to inspect.

The policeman gave a deep sigh, saying “Sir, you will need to step out of the vehicle to take a breathalyzer.”

Indignantly, O’Carroll replied, “Why? Don’t you believe me?”


Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away.


Some days you’re the dog, other days the hydrant.


Another Limerick

There once was an old man of Lyme
Who married three wives at a time.
When asked, “Why a third?”
He replied, “One’s absurd!
And bigamy, sir, is a crime.”


Brian O’Connell drives a double-decker bus through the streets of Dublin. One day a very drunk Timothy Fogarty climbed aboard Brian’s bus taking a seat on the bottom deck near Brian. As you may or may not know, Brian is required not to allow any drunks onto his bus, but today he felt rather light-hearted so he decided to allow the inebriated Fogarty remain on board.

As is his wont when he has had a few Timothy began talking a mean streak, which induced Brian to suggest that Timothy should sit on the upper deck.

“The air up there is clean and fresh, and you will get a much improved view,” encouraged Brian.

Fogarty agreed and stumbled his way up top. However, he returned in only a few minutes.

“What’s wrong?” Brian asked. “Didn’t you like it better up there?”

Timothy replied, “It’s okay. But it’s too dangerous.”

“Too dangerous?” queried Brian. “How is that?”

“There’s no driver,” answered Fogarty.

At the very next stop two more drunks climbed on board the bus. The first drunk was Bill O‘Brien and the second was Tommy Lynch. Bill asked driver O‘Connell, “Will this bus take me to 35th Avenue?”

“No, it won’t,” answered Brian.

After a short pause, Tommy Lynch asked, “What about me?”



For our video today we present the voice of Orla Fallon of Celtic Woman singing “Isle of Inisfree:”

Britney Spears Update: Child Abuse, Gasless and Pantless

Here are the latest rumors on Britney Spears:

The Times of India, TMZ.com and eontarionow.com are all reporting that Britney Spears is under investigation for possible child abuse by the Los Angeles County Department of Children and Family Services. The allegations are poor dental hygiene and poor eating and sleeping habits.

The Times reported that “Spear’s lawyer Dennis Wasser appeared at an unscheduled hearing on Tuesday morning in LA County Superior Court’s dependency section, which handles child abuse claims.”

TMZ.com also reported that Britney is earning over $737,000 per month, as reported in her child custody case with her ex-husband, Kevin Federline.

SFGate.com, along with other outlets reported that Britney ran out of gas in Beverly Hills on Tuesday, and the local police pushed her car to the gas station.

Britney was also recently pulled over by the local gendarme for speeding, but was let off with a warning.

And our Brit was caught once again by the paparazzi sans undies as shown here.

It seems that the stories are coming in so fast on Miss Brit that one can barely keep up with them. The no panties photo once again will do little to help her image during her custody battle with Kevin.

What self-respecting judge is not going to listen when the mother of two is photographed topless and bottomless so frequently. One would think that Britney is trying to lose custody of her children on the basis of her recent behavior.

Naturally, most proper mothers shave their heads, spend time in rehab, get filmed crashing their cars into Mercedes, and expose their private regions to the paparazzi on a regular basis.

Of course, the paparazzi are now going to follow Britney even more because she is their meal ticket. Get a photo of Britney involved in one of her public gaffes and you do not have to work for several months.

Britney’s behavior is so bizarre that one would think she wants to be caught behaving foolishly.

Perhaps she does.

More Britney Spears…

More Celebrity Humor…